tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16096864798835648012024-02-21T07:31:12.546-05:00Doubtful CompetencyImaginary news updates from an alternate universe.
Become a follower to be first to hear the newsMark Timehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02163514972545869638noreply@blogger.comBlogger72125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1609686479883564801.post-91854008558664597972013-03-22T11:54:00.000-04:002013-03-22T11:54:43.263-04:00Sports Illustrated Announces Major Swimsuit Changes<br />
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<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-6Ob5igSS6lk/UUx-gLJofDI/AAAAAAAAA7g/y7_oSEAOThg/s1600/SI+Cover.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="142" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-6Ob5igSS6lk/UUx-gLJofDI/AAAAAAAAA7g/y7_oSEAOThg/s200/SI+Cover.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>
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The SI Swimsuit Edition has grown more risqué over the
years. Recent editions include models
clad only in body paint representations of bathing suits. SI announced sales have sharply spiked as
swimsuits have become sheerer and announced today that next year’s edition will
not include any clothes.<o:p></o:p></div>
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The 2014 Swimsuit models will wear nothing. A spokesperson said it's the next logical
step and predicted that sales will spike sharply upward.<o:p></o:p></div>
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When asked if this just turns SI into an imitation of
Playboy the spokesperson said, "No, we will continue to shoot in locations
with sand and water and we feel the readers will enjoy the new approach. They also pointed out that readers buy the
magazines for the articles and the SI articles will be better than Playboy's.<o:p></o:p></div>
Mark Timehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02163514972545869638noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1609686479883564801.post-461011984234189022012-09-12T08:00:00.000-04:002012-09-12T08:00:09.426-04:00California Rescued From Financial Bankruptcy<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-J2MrWpTkuSo/UEeUarD8Y0I/AAAAAAAAA68/dbfwy4fABkg/s1600/Chinese+dancers.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="138" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-J2MrWpTkuSo/UEeUarD8Y0I/AAAAAAAAA68/dbfwy4fABkg/s200/Chinese+dancers.jpg" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">New LA Laker Dance Team Debut</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Reeling from a string of Municipal Bankruptcies, California Governor Jerry Brown took steps to resolve the States troubled finances.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
<br />
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<span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Brown confirmed that the Chinese government has bailed out California ending the fiscal challenge he inherited as Governor.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span></span> </div>
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<span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Under the terms, California is now a province of China and is no longer a part of the United States.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Talks are underway for a massive wall that will separate California from the remaining states.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In addition to providing border security for California it is expected to create 1.2 million new jobs.<o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
<br />
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<span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Flag manufacturers expect a significant jump in sales of the new 49 State Flag but are delaying production plans while waiting to see if other states approach the Chinese Government.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">President Obama applauded the move as a major step in reconnecting the United with the global community.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">The Chinese officials were excited about the move and said they have big plans for the state.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In addition to a new Los Angeles Laker Dance Team they announced plans for a 40 foot fence and missile sites on the Mexican border to discourage illegal immigration.</span></span></div>
Mark Timehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02163514972545869638noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1609686479883564801.post-46351798925448913032012-09-09T12:00:00.000-04:002012-09-09T12:00:01.489-04:00Continuing Impact of Sanctions at Penn State<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-s_kH2Ln4FrU/UEeP5JTsy5I/AAAAAAAAA6s/yBXnnYoD4bk/s1600/penn+state+uniforms.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="133" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-s_kH2Ln4FrU/UEeP5JTsy5I/AAAAAAAAA6s/yBXnnYoD4bk/s200/penn+state+uniforms.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">The Penn State Nittany Lions took the field on Saturday and broke a long standing tradition by having the player names on the back of the jerseys.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Head coach recently announced that a long time Nittany Lion tradition ends when players’ names appear on uniforms this year.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Broadcasters have often been challenged during play by play when relying only on numbers in the past welcomed the change.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<o:p><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></o:p><span style="font-family: Calibri;">While many fans opposed the change they agreed it would now be easier to follow their favorite players.</span><o:p><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></o:p></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Unfortunately, with the transfer of most top players fans and sportscasters still don’t know who anyone is even with the names on the uniforms.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Penn State officials are considering other steps to resolve the problem including player photos on the sides of helmets and links to player Facebook Pages embedded<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>in the Game Programs. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
Mark Timehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02163514972545869638noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1609686479883564801.post-75073723377561768152012-09-07T13:01:00.000-04:002012-09-07T13:01:34.933-04:00Penn State Sells Joe Paterno Statue
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Link to Frazier story: </span><a href="http://www.inquisitr.com/321726/joe-frazier-statue-heading-to-philly/"><span style="color: blue; font-family: Calibri; font-size: x-small;">http://www.inquisitr.com/321726/joe-frazier-statue-heading-to-philly/</span></a><span style="font-family: Calibri;">
<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-6FjsEvJFgY8/UEonSo425fI/AAAAAAAAA7M/HmW8prF0ylU/s1600/Frazier-Paterno+Statue+copy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="163" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-6FjsEvJFgY8/UEonSo425fI/AAAAAAAAA7M/HmW8prF0ylU/s200/Frazier-Paterno+Statue+copy.jpg" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Proposed Frazier Statue<br />
</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">When Penn State officials heard about the initiative to
erect a statue honoring Joe Frazier in Philadelphia, they saw an opportunity to
further distance themselves from the Sandusky sex scandal.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Penn State will sell the statue to and apply the proceeds to
the NCAA Penalties.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">In a press release they
announced <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“We feel this is an ideal way
to salvage the statue and repurpose it in an honorable way.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Under the plan, Paterno’s head will be removed and replaced
with a likeness of Frazier.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Representatives of the Frazier Statue Committee said they
were excited about the offer and felt it will enable them to move up the
unveiling and complete the project at a significantly reduced cost.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">The statue could be unveiled as soon as three
months after they decide whether to use a hatless head or a head with a wide brimmed
hat.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">There was no mention of what would happen with Joe Paterno's head.</span></div>
Mark Timehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02163514972545869638noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1609686479883564801.post-30929721339153219752012-09-05T16:00:00.001-04:002012-09-05T16:00:04.633-04:00Obama Quietly Ends Gulf Trip<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-vLRK2bOF14A/UEeKB_C2HtI/AAAAAAAAA6c/QwXANnA_gU0/s1600/Obama+Golf-Gulf.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="173" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-vLRK2bOF14A/UEeKB_C2HtI/AAAAAAAAA6c/QwXANnA_gU0/s200/Obama+Golf-Gulf.jpg" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">President Obama trip ends in disapointment</td></tr>
</tbody></table><span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman;"><span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">President Obama cancelled two fundraisers and delayed his arrival at the Democratic National Convention when his advisors suggested he make a Gulf trip on the Louisiana coast.<o:p></o:p></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman;"> <br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Jay Carney told the press that the president said a trip like this must always take precedence over fundraising and convention activities.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"></span></span></span> </div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"></span>Carney emphasized that concerns for the plight of the impacted Americans trumped politics and fund raising and hope this would end the focus on the presidents fundraising activities.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Upon arrival, the President's entourage quickly disembarked Air Force One and headed toward New Orleans.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">When the caravan arrived at the site of the recent Hurricane destruction the President asked whether the Golf Course has sustained damage that would alter his approach to the game.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">He grew visibly angry when aides told him there would be no golfing during the trip.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"> When informed the trip was intended to show his concern for Americans hit hard by the Hurricane he said, "Oh, I thought you said GOLF Trip, Not Gulf Trip.<o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">The President quickly left New Orleans as aides tried furiously to reschedule the fundraisers.</span></span></div></span><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
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</div>Mark Timehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02163514972545869638noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1609686479883564801.post-64639285010973024002012-08-21T19:33:00.000-04:002012-08-21T19:33:17.293-04:00Phillies Address Polanco Health Concerns<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-VBu6fBUE4ok/UDPO2tguhBI/AAAAAAAAA54/ORhJsqtZtV4/s1600/Polanco.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="150" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-VBu6fBUE4ok/UDPO2tguhBI/AAAAAAAAA54/ORhJsqtZtV4/s200/Polanco.jpg" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">A swing away from another injury?</td></tr>
</tbody></table><span style="font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; font-size: 11pt;">Continuing concerns about Placido Polanco's health spurred Ruben Amaro to act. Polanco went 2 for 4 as he returned to the starting lineup last night.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>While Charlie Manuel was glad to have Polanco back, the Phillies have concerns for the health of their aging third basemen.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span><br />
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<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; font-size: 11pt;">Doubtful Competency investigators have learned that Ruben Amaro officially requested a personalized change to the Disabled List Rules. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Amaro hopes to gain approval to put Polanco on a 15 Inning Disabled List instead of a 15 Day list when….I mean if he is reinjured over the rest of the year.<o:p></o:p></span></div><br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; font-size: 11pt;">Under the proposal Polanco could be disabled for 15 innings allowing the Phillies to recall another player during his recovery.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If his condition improves before the end of an extra inning game he could reenter the game at the same position he was in when injured.<o:p></o:p></span></div>Mark Timehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02163514972545869638noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1609686479883564801.post-14645937926843323222012-08-03T09:00:00.007-04:002012-08-03T12:31:28.392-04:00Latest Trade in Phillies Rebuilding Process<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-FesOYf8a89w/UBu63tVRluI/AAAAAAAAA5o/QFxC7yXfDBA/s1600/Angry+Fans.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="200" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-FesOYf8a89w/UBu63tVRluI/AAAAAAAAA5o/QFxC7yXfDBA/s200/Angry+Fans.png" width="146" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Fans react to news they've been traded</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
The Phillies entered the second phase of the team breakup as Ruben Amaro<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>agreed to swap 14 Seating Sections in Citizens Bank Park for 28 Sections of Kansas City's Royal Stadium. <br />
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Amaro said the club is sending twice as many sections since Kansas City attendance is about 50% of the Philles attendance. </div>
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<div style="font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0in;">
He feels the move will help the club weather the rebuilding process by replacing some long time fans accustomed to winning with less demanding fans who have no memory of the recent string of championships.</div>
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<div style="font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0in;">
Amaro said, "We want to make sure our new and young players have the opportunity to learn and grow in a friendly ballpark atmosphere without the pressure of winning now.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Our scouts feel the new fans will keep a lower profile and just enjoy the night at the park.</div>
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<div style="font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0in;">
The front office is contacting the affected fans and they are expected to report to Royal Stadium by<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Monday.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When asked how he could guarantee the fans will report he referred to some small print in the season ticket agreements that gives the club unlimited options to change fans seats.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>While acknowledging that they had never before moved them to other ballparks he felt comfortable that the move is legal and will be approved by Major League Baseball.</div>
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<div style="font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0in;">
Amaro also indicated there could be more fan moves if the remaining ticket holders demonstrate any negative reactions during games.</div>Mark Timehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02163514972545869638noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1609686479883564801.post-89856998306408480262012-04-16T21:58:00.000-04:002012-04-16T21:58:20.340-04:00Texas Town Announces anti-Obesity Plan<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman;"> </span>Link to original story:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><a href="http://www.gallup.com/poll/153143/Obese-Nearly-Metro-Areas.aspx"><span style="color: blue;">http://www.gallup.com/poll/153143/Obese-Nearly-Metro-Areas.aspx</span></a> <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: Calibri;">The small town of McAllen Texas was stunned to learn they top the list of cities with obese residents. According to a Gallup survey 38% of residents are classified as obese. </span><br />
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<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-2jiS1kKyHGA/T4zMZpgU63I/AAAAAAAAA5Q/_q1NfPjek2o/s1600/3+fat+guys.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-2jiS1kKyHGA/T4zMZpgU63I/AAAAAAAAA5Q/_q1NfPjek2o/s1600/3+fat+guys.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">City planners shocked at town obesity rate</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">City officials reacted quickly to combat citizen obesity and announced a major initiative to sharply reduce the percentage.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They announced a contract with a major headhunter firm to recruit fit people who will be offered free housing for 24 months in an effort to reduce the percent of obese residents.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">The focus will be on locating fit families to achieve the quickest results but individuals who meet the criteria will also be considered.<o:p></o:p></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">The Mayor expresses his optimism that the town would soon fall in line with the national average.<o:p></o:p></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">He went on to deny accusations that they were also secretly relocating obese residents in surrounding towns in an attempt to expedite the results.<o:p></o:p></span></div>Mark Timehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02163514972545869638noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1609686479883564801.post-27607786339231467012012-03-12T10:15:00.001-04:002012-03-12T10:15:00.664-04:00Ruiz Kidnapping Puts Phillies Season in Jeopardy<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-kfSpUAANAGc/T1odO97iPpI/AAAAAAAAA5E/2llrLqoapu8/s1600/Guerilla+fighters.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><span style="color: blue; font-size: xx-small;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-kfSpUAANAGc/T1odO97iPpI/AAAAAAAAA5E/2llrLqoapu8/s1600/Guerilla+fighters.jpg" /></span></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: blue; font-size: xx-small;">Kidnappers eagerly await minor leaguers & bobbleheads</span></td></tr>
</tbody></table><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Phillies officials confirmed on Wednesday that Carlos Ruiz was kidnapped during a trip to visit family members in Panama.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The Identity of the kidnappers is unknown but within hours Ruben Amaro Jr. he brought the incident to a successful conclusion.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">The incident bore an eerie resemblance to the recent kidnapping of the Nationals Wilson Ramos but it was successfully resolved without military action. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Amaro responded to the kidnapper’s initial demand of $10 Million with a counter offer that formed the basis of an agreement.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Unconfirmed reports indicate Scott Boras represented the kidnappers.</span><br />
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<o:p><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></o:p><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Ruiz was released after Amaro offered 2 minor leaguers, $250, a one year supply of Dollar Dogs and Charley Manual Bubbleheads for each Kidnapper.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">When questioned, Amaro said he was pleased with the final details and said this will not count as an option for either minor leaguer.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He said this was a win-win solution for all.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The Phillies are high on the potential of both of the traded minor leaguers but they are considered soft and unconditioned.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Amaro said a stint living in the mountains with the kidnappers was just what they needed to reach their full potential as players.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
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<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Neither of the minor league players were not identified pending notification of their relatives and they were available for comment.<o:p></o:p></span></div>Mark Timehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02163514972545869638noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1609686479883564801.post-35758366275322581852012-03-08T21:40:00.000-05:002012-03-09T09:27:56.770-05:00Hilary Discovers New Family Tree Branch<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Hilary Clinton did not expect any surprises when she agreed to appear on the NBC Show, “Who Do You Think You Are”. She soon found out that like most families there are secrets waiting to be uncovered.<o:p></o:p></span> <br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Genealogical researchers discovered that she is actually the great granddaughter of Popeye the Sailor. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Hillary was reportedly shocked by the news but commented that it could explain her long time passion for spinach.</span> </div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-LATrl9mqpLU/T1lsi_ktfEI/AAAAAAAAA40/qh96Um0bwrs/s1600/Hilary+&+Popeye.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="147" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-LATrl9mqpLU/T1lsi_ktfEI/AAAAAAAAA40/qh96Um0bwrs/s400/Hilary+&+Popeye.JPG" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Striking Family Resemblance</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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<o:p><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></o:p><span style="font-family: Calibri;">An evaluation of family photos further supported the findings and showed a shocking resemblance between Mrs. Hilary and Popeye.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Hillary was not available for comment but her spokesperson said, “She am what she am.”</span></div>Mark Timehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02163514972545869638noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1609686479883564801.post-78479328585535746322012-01-24T22:00:00.001-05:002012-01-26T10:19:03.020-05:00Obama Announces New Capital Loss Tax Plan<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-2hdfLYi8V1M/Tx8f5V4W74I/AAAAAAAAA4Q/GpZg95T5ykA/s1600/obama-antichrist-evidence4.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="160" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-2hdfLYi8V1M/Tx8f5V4W74I/AAAAAAAAA4Q/GpZg95T5ykA/s200/obama-antichrist-evidence4.jpg" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Obama announces bold new plan</td></tr>
</tbody></table><span style="font-family: Calibri;">President Obama unveiled a dramatic plan to ensure the tax system is fairer during the State of the Union Address .<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He proposed strong steps to eliminate capital losses, <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>a major tax loophole currently enjoyed by the wealthiest of Americans. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Not only do the wealthy avoid tax on their losses but they are able to deduct them from their gains.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The President’s plan will eliminate this double dip benefit unavailable to working Americans.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Under the plan investors will pay a 35% surcharge on investment losses.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The announcement was met with strong approval of the Occupy Movement, Union Leaders and Social Activists.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">A spokesman for Occupy America said, “The Privileged class will now have to pay a significantly higher portion of the Federal Budget enabling us to expand social programs and level the playing field for the 99%.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">The President said, “We need to make sure all have a fair shot at the American Dream and by significantly reducing the wealth held among a small group we will finally move closer to that dream.” </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">The Administration also expects the move to significantly increase revenues and reduce the debt. </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">The President dismissed complaints from the Right that the plan will discourage investors and negatively impact employment and the US economy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Democratic spokesman pointed out that the more the Stock Market drops the greater the tax revenues under this ingenious plan.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">He went on to say that he hopes to eliminate wealth during his second term and put everyone on the same level.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He expressed hope that America will soon see a day when all Americans share in the absence of prosperity and wealth.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Harry Reid was confident that most investors will lose virtually all their wealth as the market drops generating massive new tax revenues.</span></div>Mark Timehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02163514972545869638noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1609686479883564801.post-4343187804258482642011-07-20T16:19:00.000-04:002011-07-20T16:19:00.298-04:00Lesbians Booted From San Francisco Museum<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-03MatPdEwyg/TibYO93d1gI/AAAAAAAAAGU/kOlWZMmh9-Q/s1600/lesbian+hands+2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-03MatPdEwyg/TibYO93d1gI/AAAAAAAAAGU/kOlWZMmh9-Q/s1600/lesbian+hands+2.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Unnaceptable museum behavior</td></tr>
</tbody></table><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman;"> </span><span style="font-size: 10pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Link to story - <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><a href="http://www.nbcbayarea.com/news/local/Couple-Asked-to-Leave-SF-Museum-for-Holding-Hands-125819178.html"><span style="color: blue; font-size: xx-small;">http://www.nbcbayarea.com/news/local/Couple-Asked-to-Leave-SF-Museum-for-Holding-Hands-125819178.html</span></a> </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">The gay community was shocked to learn that a very liberal San Francisco art museum removed a lesbian couple viewing an exposition of a well know gay artist.<o:p></o:p></span> <br />
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</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: rgb(250, 250, 250); line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Local activists took quick action to boycott the museum and demanded that the San Francisco Board of Supervisors intervene.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: rgb(250, 250, 250); line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">The plans were cancelled, when a museum spokeswoman explained that the couple was not complying with rules governing gay visitors and was welcome to return if they modified their behavior.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: rgb(250, 250, 250); line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Apparently, the museum recently implemented a policy requiring that all lesbian couples engage in continuous tongue kissing while viewing gay artist exhibitions.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The offending couple was only holding hands when they were removed. </span></div>Mark Timehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02163514972545869638noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1609686479883564801.post-67893812478072810992011-06-29T16:00:00.007-04:002011-06-30T08:26:46.097-04:00Unpublished John Lennon Imagine Lyrics Discovered<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: rgb(250, 250, 250); line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Link to original story:<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"> <a href="http://www.torontosun.com/2011/06/28/lennon-was-a-closet-republican-assistant"><span style="color: blue;">http://www.torontosun.com/2011/06/28/lennon-was-a-closet-republican-assistant</span></a> <o:p></o:p></b></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"></div><table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-NZCO9NyTiRc/Tgt-_6HtaOI/AAAAAAAAAGA/Ch94__Yx5zU/s1600/imagesCAENBA4A.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="139" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-NZCO9NyTiRc/Tgt-_6HtaOI/AAAAAAAAAGA/Ch94__Yx5zU/s200/imagesCAENBA4A.jpg" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Lennon preferred Reagan over Carter</td></tr>
</tbody></table><span style="font-family: Calibri;">The Toronto Sun reported that John Lennon was a closet Republican at the end<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>of his life who was somewhat embarrassed at his naiveté in his younger days.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The news surfaced in a new documentary about Lennon and reveals that he would have voted for Ronald Reagan over Jimmy Carter.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">While not verified it is rumored that before his death Lennon rewrote his famous song <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Imagine</i> to reflect his maturing view of the world.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: rgb(250, 250, 250); line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Yoko Ono was meeting with her accountant to explore new Tax Shelters and was unavailable for comment. A spokesperson said Ono still strongly supports wealth redistribution to aid the disadvantaged <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>as long as it does not affect her.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: rgb(250, 250, 250); line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Doubtful Competency</i></b> has secured a document alleged to be penned by Lennon shortly before his death.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="background: rgb(250, 250, 250); margin: 0in 0in 10pt; mso-line-height-alt: 13.5pt; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><u><span style="font-size: 14pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;">Imagine</span></u></i></b><u><span style="font-size: 14pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;"> </span>(Revised 1980)</u><o:p></o:p></span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="background: rgb(250, 250, 250); line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-size: x-small;"><o:p><span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: small;"> </span></o:p></span></span><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-size: x-small;"></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-size: x-small;"><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="background: rgb(250, 250, 250); line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 6pt; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;">Imagine there are no liberals<o:p></o:p></span></div><span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: small;"> </span><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="background: rgb(250, 250, 250); line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 6pt; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;">It’s easy if you try<o:p></o:p></span></div><span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: small;"> </span><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="background: rgb(250, 250, 250); line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 6pt; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;">Someday I hope they realize<o:p></o:p></span></div><span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: small;"> </span><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="background: rgb(250, 250, 250); line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 6pt; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;">It’s all just pie in the sky<o:p></o:p></span></div><span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: small;"> </span><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="background: rgb(250, 250, 250); line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 6pt; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;">Imagine all the people<o:p></o:p></span></div><span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: small;"> </span><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="background: rgb(250, 250, 250); line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 6pt; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;">Responsible for themselves<o:p></o:p></span></div><span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: small;"> </span><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="background: rgb(250, 250, 250); line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 6pt; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: small;"> </span><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="background: rgb(250, 250, 250); line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 6pt; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;">Imagine there’s no welfare<o:p></o:p></span></div><span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: small;"> </span><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="background: rgb(250, 250, 250); line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 6pt; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;">None for businesses too<o:p></o:p></span></div><span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: small;"> </span><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="background: rgb(250, 250, 250); line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 6pt; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;">No one we have to pay to<o:p></o:p></span></div><span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: small;"> </span><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="background: rgb(250, 250, 250); line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 6pt; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;">Do what they already do<o:p></o:p></span></div><span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: small;"> </span><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="background: rgb(250, 250, 250); line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 6pt; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;">Imagine all the people<o:p></o:p></span></div><span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: small;"> </span><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="background: rgb(250, 250, 250); line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 6pt; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;">Responsible for themselves<o:p></o:p></span></div><span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: small;"> </span><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="background: rgb(250, 250, 250); line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 6pt; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: small;"> </span><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="background: rgb(250, 250, 250); line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 6pt; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;">You may say I’m a demon<o:p></o:p></span></div><span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: small;"> </span><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="background: rgb(250, 250, 250); line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 6pt; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;">But I’m not the only one<o:p></o:p></span></div><span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: small;"> </span><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="background: rgb(250, 250, 250); line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 6pt; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;">We’re all just really tired of<o:p></o:p></span></div><span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: small;"> </span><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="background: rgb(250, 250, 250); line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 6pt; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;">Taking care of everyone.<o:p></o:p></span></div><span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: small;"> </span><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="background: rgb(250, 250, 250); line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 6pt; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: small;"> </span><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="background: rgb(250, 250, 250); line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 6pt; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;">Imagine your possessions<o:p></o:p></span></div><span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: small;"> </span><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="background: rgb(250, 250, 250); line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 6pt; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;">Your house, your boat, your car<o:p></o:p></span></div><span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: small;"> </span><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="background: rgb(250, 250, 250); line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 6pt; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;">Are not despised by someone<o:p></o:p></span></div><span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: small;"> </span><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="background: rgb(250, 250, 250); line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 6pt; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;">Who dislikes how rich you are<o:p></o:p></span></div><span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: small;"> </span><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="background: rgb(250, 250, 250); line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 6pt; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;">Imagine all the people<o:p></o:p></span></div><span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: small;"> </span><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="background: rgb(250, 250, 250); line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 6pt; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;">Keeping what they have<o:p></o:p></span></div><span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: small;"> </span><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="background: rgb(250, 250, 250); line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 6pt; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: small;"> </span><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="background: rgb(250, 250, 250); line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 6pt; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;">You may say that I’m a demon</span></div><span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: small;"> </span><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="background: rgb(250, 250, 250); line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 6pt; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;">But I’m not the only one<o:p></o:p></span></div><span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: small;"> </span><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="background: rgb(250, 250, 250); line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 6pt; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;">We’re all just really tired of<o:p></o:p></span></div><span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: small;"> </span><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="background: rgb(250, 250, 250); line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 6pt; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;">Taking care of everyone.<o:p></o:p></span></div><span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: small;"> </span></span></span></div>Mark Timehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02163514972545869638noreply@blogger.com55tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1609686479883564801.post-38107871548576104822011-05-22T18:47:00.002-04:002011-05-24T09:19:58.115-04:00Netanyahu Reconsiders Return to 1967 Borders <br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: #fafafa; border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Benjamin Netanyahu has reconsidered President Obama’s request to pull back to 1967 borders in order to create a Palestinian State in the Mid-East.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: #fafafa; line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Netanyahu’s new proposal also creates a new Latino Homeland in the Southwestern United States.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Israeli officials feel the double move will solve both the Palestinian issue and the undocumented immigrant problem in the US.</span></div> <br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-RnAeIJVuQnU/TdmRraVSJ4I/AAAAAAAAAF4/feBQIuK4cBo/s1600/049-states-and-territories-of-the-united-states-of-america-march-3-1845-to-december-29-1845.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="270" j8="true" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-RnAeIJVuQnU/TdmRraVSJ4I/AAAAAAAAAF4/feBQIuK4cBo/s400/049-states-and-territories-of-the-united-states-of-america-march-3-1845-to-december-29-1845.png" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Proposed Latino Homeland</td></tr>
</tbody></table> <br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: #fafafa; border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Under the plan the United States would pull back to pre-1845 borders and create the United Latino States on land now occupied by Texas, New Mexico, Arizona, California and other States in the region.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: #fafafa; line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">The Israeli Prime Minister said the move is necessary to provide a homeland to the displaced Latinos now seeking admittance to the United States.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: #fafafa; line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">White House Officials are studying the proposal.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: #fafafa; line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In a related action, Russia officially reclaimed Alaska since it was under Russian control in 1845.</span></div>Mark Timehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02163514972545869638noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1609686479883564801.post-14476252719115975552011-05-19T18:00:00.002-04:002011-05-21T18:12:17.922-04:00Pittsburgh Pirates Sold; New Owner Moves Team<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-leUYt3VxQOo/Tc25vtBko6I/AAAAAAAAAFs/wc8MaD1ME4E/s1600/somali+pirate+logo.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="148" j8="true" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-leUYt3VxQOo/Tc25vtBko6I/AAAAAAAAAFs/wc8MaD1ME4E/s200/somali+pirate+logo.jpg" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">New Team Logo Unveiled</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">A spokesman for Major League Baseball confirmed reports that the Pittsburgh Pirates have been sold and the new owner plans to move the team to Somalia.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">While team on-field performance has improved, attendance remains at all time lows. </span></span></div> <br />
<div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Reeling from dropping attendance and minimal sales of team memorabilia the new owner sees the move as a win-win for fans and the club.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"> </div><div class="MsoNormal" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">He went on to say, “The team is a non-entity in the area and can’t get any press coverage to stimulate their fan base.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Now, every time the news cycle reports on the pirates in Somalia we will be on people’s minds.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></span></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"> </div><table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-oR5knqa0Pa8/TdPfZdkmZKI/AAAAAAAAAF0/-GO6RkfFPKI/s1600/Somali+pirates.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="112" j8="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-oR5knqa0Pa8/TdPfZdkmZKI/AAAAAAAAAF0/-GO6RkfFPKI/s200/Somali+pirates.jpg" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Ticket Sales Team Escorts <br />
New Fans to a Game</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
<span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">We are also excited by the prospect that every day can now be fireworks day and we feel that will attract families to the park.”</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"> <br />
<span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">The 37 current Pirates season ticket holders will have first shot at seats in the new park.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The new Somalia Ballpark super boxes will include upgraded security and bullet proof glass.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Team officials are excited about the special promotion days and plan to fire the opening day baseball to home plate from a SAM missile launcher.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">The team expects a sharp increase in attendance and has already contracted with local leaders to divert passing ships to the games.</span></span></div></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"></div>Mark Timehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02163514972545869638noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1609686479883564801.post-68164329864739263322011-05-13T18:59:00.000-04:002011-05-13T18:59:48.973-04:00Harry Reid Caught in Lip Synching Controversy <table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-AnJrcAet4KA/Tc23WMbsbWI/AAAAAAAAAFo/l877xO46-Dg/s1600/harry+reid.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" j8="true" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-AnJrcAet4KA/Tc23WMbsbWI/AAAAAAAAAFo/l877xO46-Dg/s1600/harry+reid.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Reid perfecting delivery<br />
</td></tr>
</tbody></table> <div class="MsoNormal" style="background: #fafafa; border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Under significant pressure to represent the Democratic Party in Congress following the Republican takeover in the House, Harry Reid took steps to improve his ability to speak with a clear, compelling voice.<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman", "serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-bidi;"></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: #fafafa; border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Sources have learned that Reid underwent secret vocal training in an attempt to overcome his normally wimpish speech patterns.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>After 8 weeks of intensive therapy the plan was abandoned and his advisors decided to hire a vocal stand in who will record all of Reid’s comments.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Plans call for Reid to deliver all future speeches by lip synching to the prerecorded tapes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: #fafafa; border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Reid’s handlers are confident the change will work and are now considering options to give his face a more lifelike friendly look. </span></div>Mark Timehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02163514972545869638noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1609686479883564801.post-19371926074725952162011-04-28T16:45:00.003-04:002011-04-28T19:05:55.108-04:00Paul Giamatti cast as Napolitano in Lifetime Bio Pic<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: #fafafa; border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-0WtcFyZLaFA/TZ9WUcZ7AII/AAAAAAAAAFQ/iZyqBDJ9nGg/s1600/imagesCASUWHRW.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="196" r6="true" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-0WtcFyZLaFA/TZ9WUcZ7AII/AAAAAAAAAFQ/iZyqBDJ9nGg/s200/imagesCASUWHRW.jpg" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; text-align: center;"><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif; font-size: small;">Janet Napolitano...I think</span></div></td></tr>
</tbody></table><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Lifetime Network producers announced the signing of Paul Giamatti to portray Janet Napolitano in a Biopic planned for release next year. </span></div></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: #fafafa; border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">At a press conference announcing the signing studio executives said they were thrilled with the move and expected to save considerably on special effects makeup considering the uncanny resemblance the actor bears with the Homeland Security Director.</span></div></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: #fafafa; border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"></span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The studio came up with the idea after someone observed Giamatti being waved through the Orange County Airport Security line while screeners referred to him as “Director Napolitano”. </span><br />
<div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"></span></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"> <br />
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="clear: left; cssfloat: right; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-dwEJNd7y6ao/TZ9WnsnPc-I/AAAAAAAAAFY/MuZ7VueNJCw/s1600/imagesCA64GMJZ.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><img border="0" height="200" r6="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-dwEJNd7y6ao/TZ9WnsnPc-I/AAAAAAAAAFY/MuZ7VueNJCw/s200/imagesCA64GMJZ.jpg" width="136" /></span></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Paul Giamatti...I think</span></td></tr>
</tbody></table> <br />
<div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> The actor unsuccessfuly tried to convince them he was not Napolitano. TSA Screeners refused to believe him and thought it was a segment of “Undercover Boss”, the CBS Series featuring Company CEO’s who go undercover to assess how their business operates.</span></div></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br />
</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The actor was able to make his flight only after he agreed to be the homeland security director and he was allowed to pass through without a pat down check.</span></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br />
</div></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Napolitano does not support the move and is concerned that Giamatti may be too feminine fo the role.</span></div></div></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"></div>Mark Timehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02163514972545869638noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1609686479883564801.post-42763921681458642002011-04-15T20:51:00.001-04:002011-04-16T18:41:18.893-04:00Easter in Jeopardy as Area Church Service Grinds to a Halt<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-k7jLqoFAi3s/TaYCl4UdMqI/AAAAAAAAAFg/KNFDj_B1Sgs/s1600/confession+2.bmp" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="200" r6="true" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-k7jLqoFAi3s/TaYCl4UdMqI/AAAAAAAAAFg/KNFDj_B1Sgs/s200/confession+2.bmp" width="152" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">O'Malley confession continues</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">The regular church service schedule at Our Lady of the Sepulcher was discontinued forcing parishioners to attend Mass at other neighboring Churches.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">The parish recently completed a major spiritual renewal outreach to encourage wayward non practicing parishioners to return to active membership.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">One returning parishioner, Martin O’Malley, was particularly inspired and attended the Saturday afternoon penance service on January 8th.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He began confessing his sins accumulated over the 42 years since his last confession.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Mr. O’Malley remained in the confessional for the past 12 weeks and officials are reluctant to conduct mass while the confession continues.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Church officials are not sure how much longer the confession will last but there are unconfirmed rumors that Mr. O’Malley is now up to sins committed in 1998.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">While parishioners are pleased about his return to the Church they are anxiously hoping the confession is completed in time for Easter Services at the parish.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There are concerns that even when the confession ends that the services will remain suspended while Mr. O’Malley recites his penance.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Diocesan officials worry that the service suspension will result is a sharp rise in ongoing confessions by parishioners who had negative thoughts about Mr. O’Malley and are considering a fund drive to add confessionals to the church. </span></span></div>Mark Timehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02163514972545869638noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1609686479883564801.post-66365421191167510252011-04-13T08:42:00.002-04:002011-04-13T15:41:54.919-04:00President Budget Reduces Deficit by $1 Trillion<div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-mWLpd0nhGQE/TaWa-rSk21I/AAAAAAAAAFc/XuGj7vCBOSw/s1600/imagesCALE0KY4.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="149" r6="true" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-mWLpd0nhGQE/TaWa-rSk21I/AAAAAAAAAFc/XuGj7vCBOSw/s200/imagesCALE0KY4.jpg" width="200" /></a></div><span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span></span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: #fafafa; line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">A review of leaked copies of the President’s speech indicate he will propose a major change to how Federal Employees are reimbursed over a five year period in a drastic effort to eliminate the federal deficit and make significant inroads into the current Federal Debt.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: #fafafa; line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">President Obama's plan calls for a complete elimination of all Federal Salaries for the next five years.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Federal employees will be assigned to the nation’s wealthiest citizens who will cover their living expenses for the next five years.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: #fafafa; line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">The White House expects to gain bipartisan support for the measure since it avoids increasing tax rates on the wealthy and significantly reduces federal spending.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: #fafafa; line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Details of the plan are unclear but it is expected that the wealthy will be entitled to exemptions for the Federal Employees they support during the program.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span> The plan reduces the federal budget by $259 Billion per year and saves $1.3 Trillion over five years.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: #fafafa; line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> Even with the elimination of all federal salary costs the FY 12 deficit is $1.386 Trillion and there is speculation of additional drastic steps in the President’s plan.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: #fafafa; line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Unconfirmed Pentagon rumors include a 24 month stand down of the military that would eliminate all military spending and furlough all service personnel for two years. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Funding for Veterans as well as Foreign Military and Economic aid would continue. </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: #fafafa; line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">If implemented this would eliminate another $1.536 Trillion over two years.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>After elimination of the Military the FY 12 budget deficit drops to a mere $618 Billion.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: #fafafa; line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Defense officials feel it would take foreign nations at least 30 months to effectively mount a military action against the United States and that they could easily respond to any gathering threat in the six months after the stand down.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: #fafafa; line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Reaction to the plan from federal employees is mixed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Most want to know who they will be assigned to before making a decision.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><u><span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">Budget Recap (In Billions)</span></u></b><span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"> </span></span></div><br />
<table border="1" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="MsoNormalTable" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-collapse: collapse; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; mso-border-alt: solid #A3A3A3 1.0pt; mso-padding-alt: 0in 0in 0in 0in; mso-yfti-tbllook: 1184;"><tbody>
<tr style="mso-yfti-firstrow: yes; mso-yfti-irow: 0;"><td style="background-color: transparent; border-bottom: #a3a3a3 1pt solid; border-left: #a3a3a3 1pt solid; border-right: #a3a3a3 1pt solid; border-top: #a3a3a3 1pt solid; padding-bottom: 4pt; padding-left: 4pt; padding-right: 4pt; padding-top: 4pt; width: 48pt;" valign="top" width="64"><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">$3818 </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">$1645</span></span></div></td><td style="background-color: transparent; border-bottom: #a3a3a3 1pt solid; border-left: #f0f0f0; border-right: #a3a3a3 1pt solid; border-top: #a3a3a3 1pt solid; mso-border-left-alt: solid #A3A3A3 1.0pt; padding-bottom: 4pt; padding-left: 4pt; padding-right: 4pt; padding-top: 4pt; width: 145.75pt;" valign="top" width="194"><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Initial Spending Plan </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Initial Deficit</span></span></div></td></tr>
<tr style="mso-yfti-irow: 1;"><td style="background-color: transparent; border-bottom: #a3a3a3 1pt solid; border-left: #a3a3a3 1pt solid; border-right: #a3a3a3 1pt solid; border-top: #f0f0f0; mso-border-top-alt: solid #A3A3A3 1.0pt; padding-bottom: 4pt; padding-left: 4pt; padding-right: 4pt; padding-top: 4pt; width: 48pt;" valign="top" width="64"><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">-$259</span></span></div></td><td style="background-color: transparent; border-bottom: #a3a3a3 1pt solid; border-left: #f0f0f0; border-right: #a3a3a3 1pt solid; border-top: #f0f0f0; mso-border-left-alt: solid #A3A3A3 1.0pt; mso-border-top-alt: solid #A3A3A3 1.0pt; padding-bottom: 4pt; padding-left: 4pt; padding-right: 4pt; padding-top: 4pt; width: 145.75pt;" valign="top" width="194"><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Federal Salary Elimination</span></span></div></td></tr>
<tr style="mso-yfti-irow: 2;"><td style="background-color: transparent; border-bottom: #a3a3a3 1pt solid; border-left: #a3a3a3 1pt solid; border-right: #a3a3a3 1pt solid; border-top: #f0f0f0; mso-border-top-alt: solid #A3A3A3 1.0pt; padding-bottom: 4pt; padding-left: 4pt; padding-right: 4pt; padding-top: 4pt; width: 48pt;" valign="top" width="64"><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">-$768</span></span></div></td><td style="background-color: transparent; border-bottom: #a3a3a3 1pt solid; border-left: #f0f0f0; border-right: #a3a3a3 1pt solid; border-top: #f0f0f0; mso-border-left-alt: solid #A3A3A3 1.0pt; mso-border-top-alt: solid #A3A3A3 1.0pt; padding-bottom: 4pt; padding-left: 4pt; padding-right: 4pt; padding-top: 4pt; width: 145.75pt;" valign="top" width="194"><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Military Defense Elimination</span></span></div></td></tr>
<tr style="mso-yfti-irow: 3; mso-yfti-lastrow: yes;"><td style="background-color: transparent; border-bottom: #a3a3a3 1pt solid; border-left: #a3a3a3 1pt solid; border-right: #a3a3a3 1pt solid; border-top: #f0f0f0; mso-border-top-alt: solid #A3A3A3 1.0pt; padding-bottom: 4pt; padding-left: 4pt; padding-right: 4pt; padding-top: 4pt; width: 48pt;" valign="top" width="64"><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">$618</span></span></div></td><td style="background-color: transparent; border-bottom: #a3a3a3 1pt solid; border-left: #f0f0f0; border-right: #a3a3a3 1pt solid; border-top: #f0f0f0; mso-border-left-alt: solid #A3A3A3 1.0pt; mso-border-top-alt: solid #A3A3A3 1.0pt; padding-bottom: 4pt; padding-left: 4pt; padding-right: 4pt; padding-top: 4pt; width: 145.75pt;" valign="top" width="194"><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Revised FY12 Deficit</span></span></div></td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></span><span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Editor Note: These figures are taken from the official FY11 Budget Figures at </span><a href="http://www.usgovernmentspending.com/budget_current_gs.php?year=2011_2016&view=1&expand=G03090701020408000&expandC=&units=b&fy=fy12"><span style="color: blue;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">http://www.usgovernmentspending.com/budget_current_gs.php?year=2011_2016&view=1&expand=G03090701020408000&expandC=&units=b&fy=fy12</span></span></a></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Even with these satirical...and impossible... budget reductions we have a significant problem caused by reckless practices of both parties that now needs to be addressed...There are no simple sound bite solutions and partisan attacks don't advance a solution.</span></span></div>Mark Timehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02163514972545869638noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1609686479883564801.post-22755697434423482812011-04-08T17:00:00.002-04:002011-04-16T08:50:28.479-04:00Trump Uncovers New Obama Birth Controversy<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-ruHLweCyi84/TZ84SrjrYaI/AAAAAAAAAFM/KGluCk4omNE/s1600/1559621435_alg_trump_obama_xlarge.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="130" r6="true" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-ruHLweCyi84/TZ84SrjrYaI/AAAAAAAAAFM/KGluCk4omNE/s200/1559621435_alg_trump_obama_xlarge.jpg" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Trump exposes birth controversy</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: #fafafa; border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Researchers commisioned by Donald Trump made a stunning discovery when they located Barrack Obama’s actual birth certificate in Hawaii.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The document conclusively proves the President was born there but raises a shocking new development.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: #fafafa; border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Apparently, previous attempts to locate the document were thwarted by an inaccurate birth date.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Obama was actually born on August 4, 1976 making him only 32 when he was elected president.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The minimum age requirement to run for president is 35 and his presidency is now in jeopardy.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: #fafafa; border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">In a prepared statement the President said he just got caught up in the enthusiasm and did not want to disappoint his supporters when they encouraged him to run. He prayed over the matter and came to the conclusion that he was the best person for the job even if he was not technically eligible.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: #fafafa; border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">The White House refused to comment when asked which God Obama had prayed to. </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: #fafafa; border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Supporters of the president state the issue is a canard and that surely the framers understood that in the future a young candidate who was mature beyond his years would emerge as the best choice to lead the nation.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The Constitution needs to be living document that recognizes societal change.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: #fafafa; border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">A statement from the Democratic National C</span><span style="font-family: Calibri;">ommittee states that the most important consideration should be who is best able to lead our nation, not how old is he.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: #fafafa; border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">The White House also released a confidential report confirming that psychologists certified the President <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>has the maturity of a 72 year old man and a 35 year old woman making him eligible for the office.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: #fafafa; line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Developing…</span></div>Mark Timehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02163514972545869638noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1609686479883564801.post-88770575810037717662011-04-03T23:46:00.000-04:002011-04-03T23:46:35.944-04:00Startling New Evidence of Human Evolution<div class="MsoNormal" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-lQJ7_PvUUi0/TZXPbORUfSI/AAAAAAAAAFI/b7QnNl2nh2o/s1600/evolution.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="80" r6="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-lQJ7_PvUUi0/TZXPbORUfSI/AAAAAAAAAFI/b7QnNl2nh2o/s200/evolution.jpg" width="200" /></a><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Scientists are excited about the discovery of a man whose skin bonded with the fabric of a lounge chair after sitting in it for over 2 years.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">A spokesman for the Genetic Evolutionary Center said, “In the short span of 2 years we see clear proof that mankind is still genetically adapting to its surrounding environment as it struggles to survive.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">The research team contends that the skin bonding with the recliner is a natural evolutionary progression as males evolve from hunter gatherers to a more sedentary lifestyle.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Closer study revealed that the man’s legs were growing shorter and he has sprouted four additional fingers on each hand making it easier to handle the television remote control.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Scientists expect a sharp increase in evolutionary evidence and are following up on reports of a West Palm Beach woman who has multiple Credit Card Magnetic strips appearing on her wrist and forearm.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: #fafafa; border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: #fafafa; border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; line-height: 13.5pt; margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="color: #555555; font-family: "Georgia", "serif"; font-size: 10pt;"></span><span style="color: #555555; font-family: "Georgia", "serif"; font-size: 10pt;">Link to actual story: </span><a href="http://wtrf.com/story.cfm?func=viewstorystoryid=96699"><span style="font-family: "Georgia", "serif"; font-size: 10pt;"><span style="color: blue;">http://wtrf.com/story.cfm?func=viewstorystoryid=96699</span></span></a><span style="color: #555555; font-family: "Georgia", "serif"; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></div>Mark Timehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02163514972545869638noreply@blogger.com48tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1609686479883564801.post-54173501445772602342011-03-31T17:00:00.002-04:002011-04-01T09:47:18.058-04:00Top NCAA Teams Demand Do Over<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-xQWKS9-iLh8/TZPFM491jII/AAAAAAAAAFE/CNzMqwSKYZc/s1600/VCU.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="137" r6="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-xQWKS9-iLh8/TZPFM491jII/AAAAAAAAAFE/CNzMqwSKYZc/s200/VCU.jpg" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Top schools allege upsets are unfair</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Duke, Syracuse, Florida, Kansas and Notre Dame University have petitioned the NCAA to call for a do over so they can attempt to reverse upset losses in this year’s March Madness Tournament.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">In a joint statement the teams contend they were unprepared for the inferior lower seeds ability to compete and state that they would have taken the games more seriously if they knew their opponents were really going to try to win.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">The petition is cosigned by 2,573,626 NCAA Basketball Pool participants who feel their pool picks were really much better than the actual way the tournament has evolved and demand that history be corrected.</span></span></div></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">The White House confirmed rumors that President Obama has signed the petition and asked Attorney General Eric Holder to provide full support to the petitioners in the effort.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Hillary Clinton is reportedly in negotiations with the University of Pittsburgh in a last ditch attempt to convince them to join in the effort and salvage the President’s bracket picks.</span></span></div></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"></div>Mark Timehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02163514972545869638noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1609686479883564801.post-72348062418574372542011-03-29T21:05:00.000-04:002011-03-29T21:05:29.046-04:00Obama Takes Leads in Egyptian Snake Search<div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-qkGRCbExQOw/TZKBccsLcFI/AAAAAAAAAFA/AG2NU3fnyl0/s1600/obama.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="146" r6="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-qkGRCbExQOw/TZKBccsLcFI/AAAAAAAAAFA/AG2NU3fnyl0/s200/obama.jpg" width="200" /></a></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">President Obama, reeling from criticism that he has not effectively led the effort in Libya took prompt unilateral steps today to form a coalition in the United Nations to deal with the escaped Egyptian Cobra at the Brooklyn zoo.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Unidentified White House officials were quick to praise the president’s decisive action and expect a multi-national coalition will begin the search in Brooklyn by next week.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They expect the move to reassure voters that the President is able to effectively lead the nation through the many unique challenges it now faces.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">In a prepared statement the President said, “Snakes have been recorded as a threat as far back as the Garden of Eden.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The American people expect their leaders to protect them and my plan will effectively eliminate this threat.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">The President went on to say that Garden of Eden was believed by many to be in an area now occupied by Iraq and that the previous administration took no steps to deal with this potential problem.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">The Arab League and CAIR reacted sharply to the news and condemned the plan citing it as another example of American oppression.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They pointed out that the snake was in the United States legally and is entitled to the same freedoms as other domestic animals.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Upon hearing the opposition, President Obama called for a pause in action and put Vice President Biden in charge of the effort.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">The Vice President announced that he would <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>embark tomorrow on a 15 day expedition to the Amazon<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>and the Southwest to study the habits of snakes and would soon release a comprehensive plan to recapture to serpent.</span></span></div>Mark Timehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02163514972545869638noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1609686479883564801.post-90486725508693288362011-03-16T21:34:00.000-04:002011-03-16T21:34:48.754-04:00Undocumented Aliens Invade DC<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_O3jjEyWqYX0/TS-97kGTcuI/AAAAAAAAADs/YnJnuwM1Gr4/s1600/aliens2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="150" n4="true" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_O3jjEyWqYX0/TS-97kGTcuI/AAAAAAAAADs/YnJnuwM1Gr4/s200/aliens2.jpg" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Alien attorneys discuss suit</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; line-height: 13pt; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="color: #20124d;"></span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="color: #17375e; font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">An alien spacecraft landed on the mall in Washington DC early this morning setting off alarms and elevating the Military readiness level to Defcon 4.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="color: #17375e; font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">At 11:08 AM, three creatures emerged from the craft as terrified onlookers ran from the scene. The creatures were carrying a case and quickly left in a cab headed towards Pennsylvania Avenue. Police and military attempted to pursue but were unable to keep up with the taxi as it sped towards Georgetown.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="color: #17375e; font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">At 2:18 PM the creatures returned and immediately called a press conference before boarding their spacecraft. The aliens are able to communicate using any earth language but settled on Spanish because they assumed it was the national language. Apparently, they had been to California last week but no one noticed anything unusual as they travelled the state. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="color: #17375e; font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">The Aliens announced that today they served legal papers on several Georgetown area residents attempting to register stars and that more suits would follow. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="color: #17375e; font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">The Aliens distributed copies of a document and announced that they represented the Galactic Matter Development Board in a claim against 28,000 earthlings who are attempting to change the names of previously claimed stars through StarRegistry.com.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="color: #17375e; font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">As word spread, masses of local trial lawyers began to assemble in the area hoping to represent the earthlings named in the suit.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="color: #17375e; font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">The Aliens contend that 92% of the stars have already been claimed by citizens of Galdorp 7 and that any further activity would result in 8th Degree intergalactic lawsuits that are decided in a physical battle to the death between opposing lawyers. On their world these lawsuits are shown on highly rated Holographic Video broadcasts. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="color: #17375e; font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">They report that in addition to providing entertaining violent programming it significantly limits the number of frivolous lawsuits.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="color: #17375e; font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">As the Alien spoke, the assembled trial lawyers began to quietly leave the area and declined to comment.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="color: #17375e; font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Shortly after the craft rose and disappeared on the horizon, the Senate took up debate to determine if the aliens were entitled to citizenship and all benefits. The San Francisco Board of Supervisors approved a vote declaring it was an official Sanctuary City for any intergalactic aliens who choose to settle there.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="color: #17375e; font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">A spokesman for StarRegistry.com said they intended to aggressively contest the charges. There was no confirmation to reports that they are unable to find a lawyer willing to represent them. At last report they are working with World Wrestling Entertainment (WWE) to find a representative to handle the suit.</span></span></div></div></div>Mark Timehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02163514972545869638noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1609686479883564801.post-31167073585861046362011-03-07T17:00:00.001-05:002011-03-10T16:20:10.881-05:00New Plans Unveiled to Eliminate All Greenhouse Gasses<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://lh5.googleusercontent.com/-YLcWsrPt-Kg/TXWWd6fs79I/AAAAAAAAAE4/7IqlBoHVl_M/s1600/greenhouse.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="172" q6="true" src="https://lh5.googleusercontent.com/-YLcWsrPt-Kg/TXWWd6fs79I/AAAAAAAAAE4/7IqlBoHVl_M/s200/greenhouse.jpg" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">New Solution to Climate Change</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Climatologists released a major report endorsing a plan they believe will eliminate greenhouse gasses and end the global warming threat once and for all.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Irving M. Dents, PhD announced that the solution is so simple that it was overlooked all these years.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The plan calls for the immediate destruction of all greenhouses throughout the world.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Doctor Dents is confident his plan will virtually eliminate the gasses emanating from the greenhouses ending the global threat.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He predicts that temperatures will immediately drop and climates will stabilize at normal levels.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">The proposal was met with skepticism by another group of scientists who fear the plan will result in catastrophic damages throughout the world.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Their report warns of dire consequences if greenhouses are destroyed and release all their gas into the atmosphere.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The group agrees the greenhouses are at the heart of the solution but they insist we need thousands of additional larger greenhouses to contain the gasses preventing them from leaking into the atmosphere. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Politicians are divided along party lines with Democrats supporting the destruction of greenhouses and adding that the effort will create thousands of new greenhouse demolition jobs.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Republicans feel additional greenhouses will not only solve the environmental challenge but will also stimulate the economy and create thousands of new greenhouse construction jobs.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">The Administration is considering the proposals and may move forward with both rather than risk picking the wrong solution. Regardless of the final decision they plan to propose a new Green Jobs Investment Tax on the building or destruction of any greenhouses.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Officials are discussing whether the new greenhouses should be constructed on the sites of the newly destroyed ones or whether they should be built in new locations.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Analysts expect them to decide on new locations so that the destruction and construction can begin simultaneously.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The $427 Billion effort will begin using stimulus funds. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">The Congressional Budget Office estimates the effort will eliminate the current deficit by reducting future medical costs as a result of the improved climate. The Senate Finance Committee is already planning how to use the projected savings to fund additional new projects.</span></span></div>Mark Timehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02163514972545869638noreply@blogger.com7