New Plans Unveiled to Eliminate All Greenhouse Gasses

New Solution to Climate Change

Climatologists released a major report endorsing a plan they believe will eliminate greenhouse gasses and end the global warming threat once and for all. 

Irving M. Dents, PhD announced that the solution is so simple that it was overlooked all these years.  The plan calls for the immediate destruction of all greenhouses throughout the world.  Doctor Dents is confident his plan will virtually eliminate the gasses emanating from the greenhouses ending the global threat.  He predicts that temperatures will immediately drop and climates will stabilize at normal levels.

The proposal was met with skepticism by another group of scientists who fear the plan will result in catastrophic damages throughout the world.  Their report warns of dire consequences if greenhouses are destroyed and release all their gas into the atmosphere.  The group agrees the greenhouses are at the heart of the solution but they insist we need thousands of additional larger greenhouses to contain the gasses preventing them from leaking into the atmosphere.

Politicians are divided along party lines with Democrats supporting the destruction of greenhouses and adding that the effort will create thousands of new greenhouse demolition jobs.

Republicans feel additional greenhouses will not only solve the environmental challenge but will also stimulate the economy and create thousands of new greenhouse construction jobs.

The Administration is considering the proposals and may move forward with both rather than risk picking the wrong solution. Regardless of the final decision they plan to propose a new Green Jobs Investment Tax on the building or destruction of any greenhouses.  

Officials are discussing whether the new greenhouses should be constructed on the sites of the newly destroyed ones or whether they should be built in new locations.  Analysts expect them to decide on new locations so that the destruction and construction can begin simultaneously.  The $427 Billion effort will begin using stimulus funds. 

The Congressional Budget Office estimates the effort will eliminate the current deficit by reducting future medical costs as a result of the improved climate.  The Senate Finance Committee is already planning how to use the projected savings to fund additional new projects.